janeortho 发表于 2011-7-1 14:26   只看TA 101楼
精品呀,先下了再说,谢谢楼主了。最喜欢这种类型的h文了。
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小绵羊三号 发表于 2011-8-26 14:22   只看TA 102楼
文章总体来说还不错,但个人认为欢爱场面写的不够刺激,也许这是楼主自己的风格吧
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lingzhi095111 发表于 2011-11-12 22:57   只看TA 103楼
情节设计的很好单丝文笔措辞上就不敢恭维了,只希望楼主以后能够多看书以此来增加自己的文学功底,不要见怪啊,我想在文字上再斟酌斟酌本文会更加完美。
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wang562cn 发表于 2012-7-9 10:36   只看TA 104楼
情节、构思都不错希望能快点接下去写能看到该文的续篇
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80310 发表于 2012-7-12 13:23   只看TA 105楼
有创意啊!呵呵不过就是太短了哦!在写长点任务描写细致点就好
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46249582 发表于 2012-11-2 22:39   只看TA 106楼
看的不过瘾啊楼主。再次几点啊!
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